Mario is one of the bigger boys/allies known to be in the higher ranks of SimpleFlips' robot army. He was one of the top Field Commanders during the "Big Bad BUP Battle/Hoedown of Bob-Omb Battlefield" of 2006, before the original game of Super Mario World was even released to the public, according to Simple and Foxen. Also according to old history texts in Piplup Guy's GBJ archives (which is a GBJ itself), Mario is also a member of Simple's cavalry, warriors who ride horses with huge cocks into battle, wielding SimpleFlips' own cum that can move mountains to crush their enemies. Apart from his recognition of being a hero and weapon of war, he is also known for his impeccable voice acting in each installment of "MARIO SCREAMING", which has brought joy to our very own Gay Idiot.

With enough willpower, Mario is one of the few people who can escape lava and quicksand with his ever-so powerful and extensive list of abilities, something that SimpleFlips is yet to master at avoiding. Usually, he joins Simp in his streams, appearing in the ROM hacks that Mr. Flips himself plays. Though he and Mario may seem like good friends, SimpleFlips is not on good terms with Mario's peenie-ween.

Here are some of the things the Mighty Plumber himself says:

  • "Yahoo! Yahoo! Yahoo! Ya- ya- ya- ya- ya- ya- ya- yahoo!"
  • "Mamma mia, spaghetti, ravioli, garlic bread, rice, lukewarm milk."
  • "Mod Gonzalo."

Aliases: The Mighty Plumber, Mario, and Lukewarm Milk-Man.


  • Never dies.
  • Can BLJ off of Jesus.
  • Has gay gloves.
  • Can retain his pasta power even while in a wheelchair.
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